River of Love
Author: Kan Tiong Siong
That summer of 1963,
I, 19; She,17
She, a junior at Girls’ High
I, a freshman at NTU
We met at Harbor City
promenading along
River of Love
Oh, what an inception
Of my wonderful life!
Love at First Sight
In the summer of 1963, Blues Lee and I went to visit the industrial park at the southern port of Kaohsiung. We were freshmen then at the civil engineering department of National Taiwan University (N.T.U). It was a wonderful trip, my first time to see the countryside of central and southern Taiwan by train. Back then, the train was the old-fashioned type with coal-fired engines. Blues had studied for a year at a university in Taichung (中興大學)before N.T.U. Therefore, he was very familiar with the train ride and the country sceneries. We were sharing each other’s stories, families, and dreams. His father was a professor of avant-garde water-color painting. With interesting conversations the train ride seemed quite short.
Taiwan was in the process of evolving from an agricultural economy to an emerging industrial one. Therefore, the government sponsored the summer program of showcasing the first industrial park to the young generation. After nearly four hours, we arrived at our destination. We joined the crowd at the industrial park. There were many groups from different parts of the island with banners showing different school names. I was attracted by Nan-Yang Girl High (蘭陽女中), the girl school from my home county of Gi-Lan (宜蘭). I noticed her right away among those young girls with blue shirts and white skirts. Under the brilliant sun, she stood out like a sunflower with healthy, shining complexion and charming smile. I asked Blackpana (潘秀明, B.P.) who she was. B.P. was a classmate of mine when we were in the elementary school in Lo-Tung (羅東小學) and Gi-Lan High (宜蘭中學). He lived in Kaohsiung. That day he came to see the chaperone of the girl’s group from Lan-Yang. B.P. told me Pearl was a junior, champion of musical competition, and ping-pong player representing the school in intermural competitions. B.P. introduced us. We had good chemistry; we were comfortable and easy although it was awkward at the beginning on my part. Blues and I tagged along with the girls to go shopping downtown. Afterwards, we strolled along the reputed River of Love. Blues took pictures for the group. With the picture as an excuse, I got her address. It was karma that united us.
In my days, marriages were mostly arranged by matchmakers. In that propitious day with B.P. as the matchmaker and Blues’s camera, we had had a very good first step. Especially back then, very few people could afford a camera. With the photos, I went to her house. It was on a street with a few prominent family names in the history of Gi-Lan. Her ancestors were the pioneers developing the northern part of Gi-Lan. The street was appropriately named as “After the Saints” (聖後街). Her mother was very kind to invite me to go upstairs. The second floor was a shrine for Buddha and other deities. We had had very nice conversations; her father, a banker, and two younger sisters; her close relatives all lived nearby. It was a very wonderful launch of our smooth sail along the river of life, from the River of Love in Kaohsiung to the street of “After the Saints.” In a conservative society, it was a romance cherished by all, above all by my parents and friends. They were enthusiasts of Japanese romantic novels and movies. The summer of 1963 was indeed a dream in a Wonderland. We enjoyed being together at her home, visiting scenic places, attending temple festivals and so on.
After the end of the summer vacation, I went back to Taipei reluctantly. We continued our romance by mail telling each other’s stories. On some weekends, I took the train to visit her. During winter vacation, we and quite a few friends of ours went to climb the mountain of Tai-Pin (太平山), the most scenic site of Gi-Lan. It was a very wonderful trip, enjoying the snow and watching the sunrise. The trip further enhanced our relationship, especially as it was blessed by our friends. In the summer of 1964, my classmates and I went to the training camp of Hill of Success (成功嶺). Back then, the government had the policy of ROTC (reserved officers training corp.) for the college students. It was a boot camp. We got up at six in the morning, finishing personal hygiene in 30 minutes, then followed by a patriotic study for 30 minutes. The study was basically a process of brainwash instilling the political ideas of Chiang Kai-shek and his grandiose dream of “Counterattack the Mainland, Recover the Fatherland, Wipe out Communist Robbers” etc. We shouted out of our guts with slogans to be loyal to Chiang. After political indoctrination, the physical training began, with marching, forming, target-shooting, combat fighting, etc. After lunch, we took a siesta, then did the exercises all over again. After dinner there was political indoctrination again. Then bedtime, the best time of the day despite sleep-talking, teeth-grinding, even sleepwalking. All these military activities became interesting materials in my weekly letters to Pearl. Whenever I received her replies, my comrades shared my joy.
After the boot camp, school started again. Pearl came to Taipei to study at Chinese Culture College (nowadays it is Taipei Culture University). Our life was enjoyable, hiking, rowing, visiting old temples especially spending time on the NTU campus. The campus is well-known for its garden-like variety and beauty; azaleas everywhere and palm tree-lined boulevards. we enjoyed strolling around or hiding ourselves under the flowery bushes in the moon-lit evenings. Movies were our utmost favorites, Japanese romance or American films of wars and cowboys. In the summer of 1965, college students were required to be trained in their respective assigned military division as Army, Air Force, or Navy. Several classmates and I belonged to the Air Force but trained as anti-aircraft officers. The training base was in Hui-lien (花蓮) on the east coast of Taiwan. The camp was by the mountain side. It’s a very beautiful area. The training was basically about anti-aircraft weapons such as cannons and guns. Just like in the boot camp, political indoctrination was foremost. Over the weekends, fellow cadets and I explored the scenic areas and lakes. The life of these military trainings and touristic adventures became topics in my letters to Pearl. After the stint of anti-aircraft training Pearl and I renewed our romance, enjoying each other even more than ever. The last year of university was hectic. Among other things, the mandatory one year of military service was on everybody’s mind. By drawing lots, I was assigned to go to the frontier tiny island of Kinmen (金門), a few miles from the hostile Chinese Communists across the sea. I was very upset for this misfortune. To begin with, I never was a believer of Chiang Kai-shek’s rhetoric of “Recover the Mainland,” but most of all I just didn’t want to separate from Pearl.
M.S. for Military Service
Fortuitously, a classmate who was a KMT party member impressed on us there was a clandestine edict by the Defense Minister of the time, Chiang Ching-kuo (蔣經國), son of Chiang Kai-shek. The edict allowed graduate study toward a Master’s degree to substitute military service, provided a national defense thesis be submitted after graduation. It was a good deal for me – not only not having to go to the frontier, but also getting a monthly stipend for doing research work. I considered this as my lucky move for not going to the frontier to fight for the Chiang regime and to not separate from Pearl. I also took the opportunity to gain a job with the Taiwan Sanitation Bureau (台灣環境衞生實驗所) which was the predecessor of Taiwan Environmental Protection Agency formed years later. My work for the city of Taipei involved the study of solid waste sources, characterization, and methods of treatment and disposal. The project was sponsored by the WHO (World Health Organization). But when time came for my pay, I was told there was no money for me. I was furious and mad. My supervisor told to me that the Chinese bureaucrat in charge of the WHO project was a notoriously corrupt KMT member. This guy used my personal payroll information to cash my pay for my work and used the work I had done to fake data as a basis for WHO report. This episode was my firsthand experience with the Chinese corrupt official, although I had long heard about the notoriety from my parents and other Taiwanese who had suffered since Chiang usurped Taiwan from the Japanese. When the Chinese took over, they exploited the island’s economy with abandon, resulting in the “228 Uprising” of 1947. 30,000 or so Taiwanese were slaughtered by Chiang’s army. With this history as a backdrop, I decided to take this injustice in my own hands. I kept the motorbike which was assigned to me by the bureau. I locked it in my dormitory with a message for the bureau that they had to pay me if they wanted to get it back.
T.T.C.I
Through the help of a classmate of mine, I was employed by T.T.C.I (Taiwan Technical Consultants Inc. (台灣技術服務社)to work at the project site of a major dam in the central mountain region. It was a project of Taiwan Power Company. My work was to work with the Yachio Engineering Company (八千代工程公司), a Tokyo-based firm specializing in water resource development. Yachio was the principal consultant to Tai-Power while T.T.C.I was its subconsultant. My work was to assist the Japanese engineers in the in-situ testing of dam foundation and earthquake monitoring as a basis of dam and reservoir design and construction. I enjoyed the work very much because of the full-scale on-site testing equipment and instruments involved. Also, I appreciated the professionalism of the Japanese engineers in huge contrast to the Chinese director at the Taiwan Sanitation Bureau. My enthusiasm and dedication was very much recognized by Yachio and T.T.C.I alike. They wanted me to team up with them in the next project in the South. However, I decided to finish my M.S. degree, so I left the dam project. After several months of separation, Pearl and I enjoyed ourselves even more than ever. The thesis for my graduate study was the treatment of textile-dying wastewater. Through the help of a friend of mine at the factory, I set up a pilot treatment plant on site. I took samples of the wastewater influent and effluent to determine the efficiency of the treatment of BOD, COD etc. T.T.C.I continued to pay me for my thesis work because it intended to get into pollution-abatement business. That was the time when industrial development had caused tremendous pollution and laws were instituted to abate pollution. I had my thesis ready with my job with T.T.C.I waiting on the wing. Other classmates also had their future employment secured based on the premises of so-called “national defense thesis in lieu of military service.” To our chagrin, we were informed that the policy had been revoked by the defense minister and we all had to serve in the military. Some classmates got incensed and protested. They were investigated for possibly inciting “campus riot” which had serious consequence under the martial law. Fortunately, the matter was settled by assigning each of us to teach at the military academies of Army, Navy, or Air Force. As we later learned, the policy of “national defense thesis” was conjured by the top KMT partisans to benefit their sons to skip military services. Once the goal was accomplished, the privilege was revoked. It had been conjured a decade before us when the vice president’s son and his peers had been allowed to study overseas after high school. My experience with the Chinese director at the Taiwan Sanitation Bureau on WHO project and this “defense thesis” fiasco made me totally distrust the KMT.
Naval Academy
I was assigned to teach at the department of marine engineering of the Chinese Naval Academy in Kaohsiung. I taught engineering mechanics to the naval cadets. Meanwhile, I also taught structural engineering at the Kaohsiung Institute of Technology (K.I.T). K.I.T had been upgraded from the former occupational school to be a college. As such, a lot of former graduates attended the new institute to get their degree in order to advance in their profession. Among my students, there was K. Y. Lee, chief of civil engineering at Kaohsiung County; M. S. Yang, manager of a chemical company; and a journalist. We became good friends despite our age differences. They had had the ambition of forming a construction outfit to take advantage of fast-paced development in the southern region. While in Kaohsiung, Pearl and I left our footprints in the parks, lakes, ancient temples, and Dutch era castles, etc. At the naval academy, most fellow instructors were busy applying to universities overseas, especially in the U.S.. I was indifferent to the idea of going abroad to study because Pearl and I were engaged and my professional prospect was very bright indeed with T.T.C.I., K.I.T, and the construction company planned by K.I.T students.
To Go or Not to Go
In April 1969, Mr. Liao, a fellow instructor of marine engineering, handed me an application form of the University of Cincinnati. He said his “ship” had arrived, meaning he had nailed a scholarship and he advised me that a foreign advanced degree would be worth more in the future. It was indeed true; with a foreign degree in Taiwan, you were privileged to hold high government positions. To heed Mr. Liao’s advice, I sent in my application as a token of appreciation of his friendship. Fortuitously, in June I received a response from the University of Cincinnati with a very generous offer. This twist of events posed a dilemma for me and Pearl because this was not in our plan. After much discussion, Pearl suggested that we get married first and I go abroad for a year or two then come back. It seemed like a very plausible idea then. We held our wedding and a banquet in a restaurant in our hometown with relatives, schoolmates, and friends as guests. The students from K.I.T came as well, they wished well for us and bid me farewell with the message that when I come back I should make sure to visit them again for the business opportunity in construction. I got a loan from my father’s friend who had a construction company in Taipei, and another loan from Prof. Lee, Blues’ father. Although it was a loan, there was no written agreement at all. Nevertheless I paid them back with ample interest after a year and a half. I bought the plane ticket, kept US $100 and left the remaining amount for Pearl and my mother. It was the most excruciating day in my life at the airport. I almost decided to stay when I saw the tears in Pearl’s eyes.
In America
At the University of Cincinnati, Dr. Preul introduced me to the project of urban runoff characterization. It was a project financially sponsored by the U.S. Federal Water Pollution
Control Administration, the predecessor of U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA). My role involved in the development of a computer model simulating watershed hydrology and pollution during rainfall events. I also had to set up rainfall monitoring gages and water samplers for analysis in the laboratory. This job suited me very well as I had field experience with the WHO, as well as experience with dam site in-situ testing and wastewater sampling and testing. My enthusiasm and studiousness impressed Dr. Preul and fellow project participants very much. The monthly research scholarship was pretty generous. I sent Pearl and my mother money every month with an amount equivalent to the monthly salary of a college instructor in Taiwan. The research work went along very well. The classes had been interrupted several times by anti-Vietnam war protesters with slogans of “Hey, Hey, LBJ, how many kids you’ve killed today.” LBJ was the at the time President Lyndon Baines Johnson. I understood the sentiments of the protesting young men very well because I was a war evader as well back in Taiwan. On Earth Day in April 1970, the U.S. EPA began its enforcement of pollution control. My work experience benefited me tremendously in my subsequent professional career. Meanwhile, I received a letter from Pearl that we had our baby son. I was ecstatic, excited, and happy; I was so joyous that I rolled over the snow on the campus ground. Realizing I had more responsibilities as a father, I made up my mind to look for a job. Fortuitously, in May a fellow student showed me a want-ad looking for an engineer of my background. I sent in my resume to the Cleveland based DDL, a major architectural-engineering company in the vicinity of Lake Erie. A week afterwards came a letter with a plane ticket for an interview. Mr. Childress, vice president of DDL was so impressed by my academic and work experience, he made a very generous offer to me and wanted me to start work right away. I told him I had the commitment to finish my work at the University and I would work for him in September. This attitude impressed him even further. Dr. Preul was very happy for me for being able to line up a job for myself with a major A-E firm, but he was kind of sorry to see me leave the team. He had the Ph.D. program in mind for me as a natural extension of the project. I completed the report as my M.S. thesis and left for DDL as an environmental engineer.
DDL
I began work at DDL on Sept.1, 1970. My first assignment was a survey and inventory of the industrial pollution along the Cuyahoga River, the major river draining the regional watershed and discharging into Lake Erie. After World War II, fast industrialization had resulted in unabated pollution. The river was lined with steel, cement, textile, chemical, food, agricultural, and all sorts of manufacturing facilities. The pollution was so severe that the river was once on fire and became a national scandal. My investigation resulted in a comprehensive report summarizing pollution loadings, tentative treatment schemes and construction cost. At DDL I worked as hard as I could under Mr. Gard, a senior engineer with extensive academic and engineering expertise. DDL had a comprehensive engineering library full of engineering, architecture, as well as managerial and humanity journals and books. I devoured as much as I could to improve my technical skills and human relationships. To acculturate myself to my adoptive country was most important to me. By reading engineering technical journals I had found there was room for developing and improving engineering methodology. I started writing technical articles for publication. The editor of American Society of Civil Engineers (ASCE) was so kind as to patiently correct my grammatical errors and improved my writing skills. After several articles, he just published my articles as submitted. An article of hydrological method received significant acclaim from engineers even from overseas. Some even called me and Mr. Childress for permission to computerize it. Mr. Cunningham of a New York-based consulting engineering company invited me to his Baltimore office with the consent of Mr. Childress to instruct his engineers the application of my method. My effort had gained my standing among peers and a reputation at DDL. This resulted in a higher salary and more responsibilities. In the spring of 1971, Pearl and Johnny came to join me in Cleveland. Because I had a job, Pearl and Johnny were able to join me a year or so after I came to America. For others it took two or more years until they showed financial security. The three of us enjoyed our American life very much. Johnny became the center of our family. Pearl was a full-time mother. A very happy family indeed. As I grew professionally, I also desired to widen my field of vision and broaden my opportunities. So I joined Toastmaster International (T.I.) to improve my speech and social skills. At the T.I. I had met professionals such as lawyers, accountants, and doctors, etc. Fortuitously, a fellow member, Mr. John Danko, introduced me to Mr. John David Jones who owned his consulting engineering firm, JDJ, in Akron. Mr. Jones offered me a position as chief environmental engineer at his company. Pearl was very happy to see my advancement in my profession. In July 1974, the three of us moved to Akron with a bright future for our family.
JDJ
JDJ was a consulting engineering firm serving cities, towns, and counties. I was involved in environmental planning and designing wastewater treatment facilities of Summit and Tuswaras counties. Both counties were experiencing fast growth in population and the economy. I developed various treatment schemes as well as watershed hydrology for the environmental impact studies of the projects. As Mr. Childress of DDL wanted me to continue his project, Bill Bandy, my successor at DDL, came to discuss my options with me. As I was very busy with JDJ and in order to avoid any conflict of interest, I went to Dr. Sarikelle, professor of civil engineering at the University of Akron. He was very delighted to undertake the project and I acted as his consulting associate. We worked on several projects together and presented a technical paper at the symposium at the University of Maryland based on my hydrological thesis with a grant from the Ohio Water Resource Department. Our family bought a very cozy house in the suburb of Akron. Johnny enjoyed the companionship of his playmates. Pearl was highly pleased with our prosperity in a short time in America. She had assimilated to the American life very well, enjoying social activities and beauty of the countryside. In March, Johnny had a brother, Jeffrey, to be a new member of our family. Everything was really hunky-dory for us, as Americans would say. With my busy work at JDJ and participation on academic projects, I thought I had reached the climax of my carere. However, after the two major projects almost came to an end, I had the desire to gain more experience by diversifying both professionally and geographically. In May 1976, I responded to an ad in the ASCE journal of water resources for a project manager in the upper mid-west region. Shortly after, Mr. Gene Avery, vice president of American Consulting Services (ACS), invited me to Minneapolis for an interview. He met me at the airport and dropped me at the office of Dr. Schwartz, an industrial psychologist. After two hours of verbal and written tests, Mr. Avery sent me back to the airport saying he would get back to me one way or the other. A week later, he picked me up and dropped me off at Dr. Schwartz’s office again. The psychologist told me “either you are crazy or you really have something to offer to ACS.” He further suggested to me he would recommend me for ACS, provided I study more about American culture and history and ACS retain a speech pathologist to correct my thick accent. I really appreciated such a critical assessment and candid recommendations. I liked ACS right away. After the psychological evaluation, Mr. Avery drove me to ACS to meet the president Mr. Goldstein and key team players. When I told Mr. Jones of my decision, he made a counteroffer for me to stay to be a big fish in a small pond. In July 1976, Pearl, myself, Johnny (6), and Jeffrey (3 months old), moved to Minneapolis.
ACS
We lived in an apartment paid for by ACS for about three months before moving into our new house by the Minnetonka Lake. During wintertime we enjoyed ice fishing on the lake. Johnny and Jeff had fun time playing in backyard slope in the snow pile with the kids from the neighborhood. We enjoyed the laughter from the kids. In the spring, we enjoyed “smelting” when small fish from the Lake Superior swam upstream along the creek to spawn. In the summertime, fishing was the most popular activity in this state of thousands of lakes. At ACS, my work covered states in the Great Lakes Region including Ohio, Illinois, Minnesota, etc. The work involved environmental investigations on municipal sewerage systems. I enjoyed it very much because I had the opportunity to be in contact with the public and officials. I was very happy to know more about American society, politics, and culture. After a year or so, ACS had us move to Memphis to head the office of the southern region including Tennessee, Texas, Arkansas, Oklahoma, New Mexico, and Louisiana. My goal of geographical diversity had been achieved. I had a great portfolio of professional contact and clients. I had grown professionally and our family grew up with me. In July 1978, ACS was sold to PSG, a national infrastructural consulting firm. PSG wanted me to continue my employment. But Pearl and I had made up our mind to strike out on our own. In August 1978, we moved to Houston to hang up our own shingles.
CAI
I started with small private projects just to test the water in Houston. Back then, Houston was moving fast in development, it was the capital of oil and gas. People from all over the country flocked to Houston needing housing and infrastructure to accommodate the seemingly unstoppable prosperity. But then the economic downturn caused the oil & gas depression, and thus severe unemployment. CAI was able to toughen out and survive the downturn. I was able to take advantage of some governmental programs for small businesses. I worked on municipal infrastructural improvements such as sewerage and water distribution systems for cities and counties. For the Metropolitan Transit Authority (MTA), we worked on its park and ride stations and roadways. For the aviation department, we worked on terminals and runways projects. For the defense industry, we worked on Navy, Air Force, and Army projects including air stations, munition storage facilities, missile firing ranges, environment cleanup etc. For NASA, the projects included visitors parking facilities, space related support utilities, etc. With the diversification of engineering projects, CAI provided civil, mechanical, electrical, and environmental services. Therefore, my goals of geographical and technical diversification were realized after two decades of services.
When I turned 60, in 2004, I was diagnosed with prostate cancer. After surgery, Pearl and I decided to retire from our business by turning over CAI to Sam Jabori, an excellent mechanical engineering manager. In order to help Sam succeed in the business, I wrote up technical manuals summarizing technical guides and especially the pitfalls to avoid so as not to repeat common errors. I based them on the national electrical code (NEC) and developed a book, titled “Electrical Systems Analysis and Design.” It Includes electrical theory, practical applications, clarification of codes, and summaries of the wiring, sizing of protective devices, short circuiting, load analysis and electrical panel selection. This is a very comprehensive design manual to simplify design and save time & money in addition to accuracy and consistency. This was my contribution to the engineering profession. Sam has used the manual fully, saving a significant amount of time & money and has provided the plans and specifications in a very efficient way. I officially retired from CAI in 2006 and we moved to Austin to be away from the hustle & bustle of Houston. Our house is on the hill side of a forest valley. Small animals, deer, and birds are ever present. Golf courses and parks are nearby. Above all, Jeff, Theresa, and our grandchildren live a walking distance away.
IEPA
In America, environmental movement resulted in vigorous progress and great achievement by the 1990s. The U.S. EPA was not only successful in regulating air, water, soil, and industrial pollution, but also in developing a great wealth of abatement technology and control criteria. In Taiwan, rapid economic and industrial development had caused severe environmental degradation of air, water, soil, and the like. At one time, Taiwan was ridiculed as an island of garbage in major weeklies such as Time, Business Week, etc. Some of our fellow Taiwanese organized the International Environmental Protection Association (IEPA) to transfer technology and train environmentalists from Taiwan. Ding-nan Chen (陳定南), the magistrate of Gi-Lan county, had a friend of mine bring me four volumes of the environmental assessment of the planned construction of a complex of plastics manufacturing and byproduct processing. The complex planned by Formosa Plastics was nearby my ancestral home. I immediately distributed the reports to the IEPA experts with relevant experience. I then summarized the findings in a concise report and sent it back to Taiwan. Based on the IEPA report, Ding-nan Chen had squarely defeated chairman Wang of Formosa Plastics in the well-publicized TV debate. After the heated TV showdown, Formosa Plastics withdrew its plan. However, after a while Formosa Plastics renewed its effort to locate its complex in the same site. It also paid a dozen or so of village councilmen to come to visit its “sparkling clean” Plastics plant in South Texas. They also came by Houston to “exchange ideas” with me. Pearl and I gave each a copy of “Trail of Pollution – Formosa Plastics Story,” a collection of articles regarding Formosa Plastic‘s pollution of gulf bay water and penalties imposed by Texas state environmental and resource conservation. Soon after, I arranged for Rick Abraham (president of Texans United), Diane Wilson, and Ms. Vivian to visit Taiwan to attend rallies against Formosa Plastics. Texans United was a grassroots environmental organization which had won several lawsuits against Formosa for violation of environmental laws. Diane Wilson was a shrimper in the gulf bay where Formosa discharged its wastewater causing damage to the shrimp harvest suffered by the local fishing industry. Ms. Vivian was a writer on environmental issues. These three environmentalists toured Taiwan and presented their experience with Formosa in South Texas, dispelling the myth of “zero pollution” alleged by Formosa Plastics. When they came back, they held a press conference with Houston area newspapers and TV stations. Thereafter, Formosa Plastics finally decided to leave the planned site alone. Under the leadership of Mr. Ding-nan Chen, the site was developed into a very attractive water park enjoyed by Taiwanese with domestic and international sport activities.
Vernacular Taiwanese
Taiwan was colonized by the Japanese for 50 years. My parents’ generation was educated in Japanese and they spoke the language well. When Chiang Kai-shek and his followers took over Taiwan after the end of World War II, the Chinese implemented strict policy of “speak mandarin.” My mother-tongue of Taiwanese was prohibited and punishment was enforced with monetary penalty. At elementary school, I was penalized often with a badge of shame for speaking my mother-tongue. The KMT’s education and language policy had Taiwanese younger generation lose their mother-tongue as they were taught to despise their own language and culture. As such, they lost their Taiwanese identity while deeming themselves as Chinese. In order to curb such a tendency of losing Taiwanese linguistic ability, the Taiwanese Association of America in Houston had organized a school of Taiwanese languages and culture. In July 1995, Dr. Robert Tsai (蔡正隆), Dr. Ming Hu (胡民祥), and I held an international conference of vernacular Taiwanese for promoting Taiwanese language speaking and writing. Several dozens of concerned Taiwanese of all walks of life from all over the world came to Houston to present papers. It was a tremendous success in recognizing the importance of preserving vernacular Taiwanese in speaking and writing. At the meeting, I presented my unique style of writing. After the conference, I published articles on a great number of subjects in the Taiwan Tribune (公論報), a newspaper circulated in America and other countries in Europe; and Houston Taiwan News (鄕訊). In subsequent years, I published a dozen books in vernacular Taiwanese with diverse titles such as Enlightened Paths (循道上岸), Evil (逆道), A Journey of Grief (順生善後); Black Pearl: a collection of poems (黑珍珠詩集), and the like. My endeavor to preserve vernacular Taiwanese was greatly appreciated when Dr. Y. S. Chang （張憲）, former Director of Taiwan National Archives (台灣國史館）, came to interview me for an oral history. He was most impressed with my plethora of writings in articles and books. He said these works deserved a special place in Taiwan’s history. My works were collected by various academic and educational foundations including Taiwanese American Archives in Los Angeles, National Taiwan University, National Hall of Taiwanese Literature, Gi-Lan Historical Society, and the like.
A Journey of Grief
In 1996, I went to Taiwan to attend the conference of vernacular Taiwanese literature. I was invited to make a presentation of my writing experience. Right before the speech, I received an overseas phone call from Pearl. It was an excruciating news that Johnny had passed away in his apartment. Hearing this, I almost lost my head. I controlled my emotions, completed my speech, and hurried to the airport. In the airplane my emotions erupted with regret, remorse, self-blame, curses, anger, sobs etc. I wished it were just a nightmare when I landed in Houston, he would be there with Pearl to welcome me home. Oh, God, what have I done to deserve such a hellish torture. At the funeral service, I presented a tribute before the mourners.
Johnny
When you were born in Tainan, I was in Cincinnati.
While I was in Tainan, you had already gone.
Oh, Almighty, it should have me instead of my precious Johnny.
Delicate and precious as Pearl, passionate, kind, and tender.
Malice toward none and altruistic love for all.
Oh, Almighty. It should have been me instead of my all-loving Johnny.
Honesty, peace, and love were always his belief
Service, care, and empathy, forever his creed.
Oh, Almighty. It should have been me, instead of my sweet Johnny.
Seventeenth of February, a mourning Saturday,
It’s Daddy’s birthday, yet your departing day.
Oh, Almighty. Why not me, why not me, instead of my little Johnny.
The funeral service was presided jointly by pastors of the four Houston Taiwanese churches. Even though we had not been a member of any of them, we really appreciated their compassion and the sincere condolences from them. The preaching and the gospel choir helped soothe our broken hearts. The Christian way of dealing with death and the Buddhist views of afterlife gave us solace and hope. We also attended the meetings of Compassionate Friends which was an organization for the parents of children who had died at young age. By sharing sorrows and coping, we felt the cathartic relief of our sorrows, we were not alone in these dark days. I wrote up my experience of our tragedy in a book A Journey of Grief in vernacular Taiwanese and English. The book was in memory of Johnny, our sufferings, our coping, and Christian and Buddhist teachings. In May, Johnny’ s friends, alumni, and colleagues got special permission from the University of Houston to place a memorial plaque in the garden in the vicinity of the Department of Sociology. A poem by Gary Norman was inscribed on the plaque.
John
Sunlight through the moistly drenched branches and trigs,
he must be making that smile again and opening his arms
wide enough for the Sun and the Moon to fit snugly inside.
There it waits, I see the drip of his caring from the
branch. Is the tree too exhausted to hold the water?
He is tired, let him rest.
The puddle is growing.
His kindness is falling and touching all of us.
What is this? The fluid is nourishing
the soil like a hungry cat drinking its milk.
His vision and being have lingered with us and he is leaving for a better place.
We wish wellness and serenity to all.
Our loss is great.
A memorial tree was planted and we formed a circle around the tree and sang soulful hymns. After the prayer, I gave them each a copy of A Journey of Grief. A professor of sociology commented she could use the book as a lesson or consoling the bereaved.
A Journey of Nostalgia
In May 2005, Jeffrey told us that he and Theresa would get married after seven years of romance. He would honor the Taiwanese tradition of visiting our ancestral home and relatives. We were so pleased to hear the good news and the opportunity for us to visit Taiwan. After all, it had been quite some time since our last visit and it would be Jeff’s first time. We landed in the southern city of Kaohsiung and Pearl’s sister and her husband came to give us a warm welcome. They live in Tainan, a few hours drive from the airport. We first visited the River of Love where Pearl and I had our first sight of love. After so many years, the river had been very much face-lifted and become a wonderful scene. Jeff was very much impressed not only because of its nostalgic value for us but also the world-class of its beauty. For the next few days, we visited scenic lakes, parks, and ancient temples as well as Dutch era castles and ruins in Tainan and its environs. After southern Taiwan, we then took the high speed train to Taipei where the families of my sister and Pearl’s aunt resided. We enjoyed sumptuous food and delicacies and all sorts of popular sweets. The ancient temples we used to visit in our young days were more crowded. The all-night Taipei life crowded with well-dressed youngsters with high tech gadgets and games impressed Jeff even more. After Taipei, we traveled to Gi-Lan, old home county for us. Relatives and friends were still there. I had an emotional outburst when I visited the ancestral hall with the pictures and painted portraits of my parents and grandparents. We visited our family shrine where ancestors’ tablets were dedicated. The shrine was surrounded by rice paddies. My brothers told us they were planning to build a long-term care center for the elders. Jeff was so impressed with the legacy of our ancestors who had left the land to benefit the society. With best wishes and gifts, we came back to America.
Taiwanese Americans
Jeff and Theresa now have Jonathan (13), Paige (11), Emily (8), and Colette (5). A beautiful and happy family indeed. They live in a nature reserve area just 3 miles from us, an ideal situation everybody would like to have. We enjoy our retirement with familial closeness. In order to pass on our legacy to our descendants, I have written two books: One is The Saga of a Taiwanese-American Family. It is about my journey in life growing up in Taiwan, academic achievements, and coming to America. The other is Taiwanese History and Memory. It is the history of Taiwan from my viewpoint, which may seem different from the typical Chinese-oriented versions. I gave each of my grandchildren a set of the books, which I hope they would pass on as family legacy and heirloom from generation to generation. In 2020, the Covid19 pandemic ravaged the globe. As of this writing, more than 450,000 Americans have lost their lives. I have taken advantage of the “lockdown” by interpreting the 2,000 years old texts of Lao Tzu’s Tao Te Ching (道德經). I interpret the ancient text in five ways, namely, as ancient Chinese texts, vernacular Taiwanese, Buddhistic wisdom, English, and a reading guide. I have gained tremendous philosophy from Lao Tzu’s profound sayings. In particular he says, “Behind any calamity, there lurks a blessing. Misfortune follows a fortune.” My life seems to have borne this out. On my recent birthday party, Paige, an enthusiast in arts, made a huge cake with Love shaped as a boat and 76 as a mast with sail panels. When everyone was singing “Happy birthday to Ah-gong,” my eyes became misty and my ears seemed to hear the ripples of the River of Love whispering: 1963, a very wonderful year.
I, 19; she, 17
She, a junior at Girl High
I, a freshman at NTU
Love at first sight
along the River of Love
It was the inception
of my wonderful life
January 20, 2021. Austin, Texas, USA. By Kan Tiong Siong, a.k.a J.S. Chien 簡忠松
Translated from 121. 愛河 / 簡忠松 by author
Posted 2/1/2021
